Not the man we're seeing on our screen. The lost, aimless man who doesn't seem to feel comfortable anywhere. Not the shell of a man who wanders through his life like a ghost. Not the distracted man who stands by numbly while pots like Ryan Lavery call the kettle black. Not the sad man who mopes around his own house, trying desperately (and unsuccessfully) to find five minutes of peace from the family of strangers who have invaded his space. He is lost, clearly. And it is becoming increasingly difficult to watch.
I miss the man who would have reminded Ryan of another person they know who killed their brother ... Jonathan Lavery. Ryan wasn't so quick to want to see him in prison, was he? Maybe Annie just needs to have the bad cut out of her, too.
I miss the man who would have put Bianca and Reese up in the finest suite the casino had to offer. And the man who would have at least asked Bianca what the hell she thought she was doing, showing up in Pine Valley with her due date in sight, without ever bothering to clue the rest of the group in on her little secret. (Look, we all know he would never really yell at Bianca, but the question deserves to be asked, and we deserve to hear the answer. More importantly, we deserve to see him upset about it.)
I miss the man who, during the last coma, sat by his wife's bedside and held her hand. The man who talked to her ... telling secrets and begging her to come home. Now it seems Zach can't get any time alone with Kendall without Bianca showing up with her sad face and the same old question: "How's Kendall?" She's in a coma, Bianca! That's how she is. Don't you think you would have gotten a phone call if she'd suddenly opened her eyes? Do you think he would leave you out of the loop with something that important? Oh wait, new mommy, of course you do. Isn't that exactly what you would have done ... what you did?
I miss the man who would never apologize to Ryan Lavery for doing what he thought was right, no matter the consequences. But this version of Zach - the Zach Zombie, if you will - never stops apologizing to Ryan. It's enough already. He doesn't owe Ryan anything. Zach's mistakes aren't any more significant than anybody else's. Ryan just thinks if he can get Zach to take the blame, somehow that absolves him, but it doesn't work that way. Maybe if Ryan could keep it in his thong, Annie wouldn't have been driven to such extremes to keep him.
Boy, don't get me started on that! This is supposed to be about Zach.
In short, I miss this Zach:
I know he's in there, buried beneath a barrage of baby dramas and near-death experiences. It's been a hell of a year for Team Slater, and the cracks are finally beginning to show. Zach needs Kendall to help him break through the bad stuff and find hope in the good. He needs her to remind him what all the struggle is for. He needs her to wake up and tell him how much she loves him. (He really needs to hear that.) And he needs her to be the one thing he needs most right now ... his best friend. I hope he gets her back soon - make that VERY soon. Because until he does, we'll never get back the Zach we need. He's lost without her, and I'm lost without him.
BTW, kudos to Thorsten Kaye for ripping my heart out every single day. This is in no way meant as a criticism of him. I live for him. If he was a lesser actor, this would be easier to take. But he's so good at tapping into Zach's pain and loneliness, even in a crowded room, that I am literally becoming depressed over fictitious characters.
And now there's a snowstorm and a convenient little cabin. And is Zach tree hunting with his boys? Nope. Maybe little Mimo? Uh-uh. That might actually make sense. No, we get more bonding time with Reese. And of course, more talk about how much he needs to be with Kendall. But when will we get to see that?
Why do the writers hate me so much? Or am I supposed to be enjoying this? GRRRRRR!!!! Calgon ... take me away!
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